Daha onceden belirttiğim gibi sınav tarihim Ocak 15 bu yuzden elimden geldiğince fazla yazacağım, sıkıldığınız yerde dur dersiniz :)

Ilk essayim;


In the future, students may have the choice of studying at home by using technology such as computers or television or of studying at traditional schools. Which would you prefer? Use reasons and specific details to explain your choice.



Although many students choose of studying in traditional schools, I would definitely support the idea that is studying at home using my computer or other materials that I can harness. I believe this idea for a variety of reasons.

First, while I am studying at home I believe that I would be less stressful than I am in a real class, for example; in the real class it is probable that I can be asked some questions by the teacher that I may not answer, so at that time I would be stressed in the class. But there is no probability that I feel the same way while I am studying at my home.

Second, studying at home also brings me lots of benefits, one of them is I can record the lesson and re-watch it whenever I want. When I started to learn English I harnessed from some DVDs which are recorded by some teachers. These DVDs were really helpful for me because I did not know anything about English before and there were difficult units that I cannot understand easily. I watched these DVDs much time until I understand the unit. I believe that materials accelerated my learning. If I decided to go a traditional course or school I would learn English as well but this would take much longer than I expected.

Third, when I study at my home with the technological equipments, there is no time limit for me because if I do not feel very well to study, I simply do not. Last year I attended lots of social activities, so I really could not find much time to study in the daytime but I studied that lessons in the evenings instead. So these materials helped me a lot. If I had gone to traditional school I would have missed lots of class because of my activities and I might fail the class.

Generally, a very nice well balanced essay. There are a few points that you need to work on though. First of all your introduction is a little on the short side. I would also advise you from stating your opinion so early in introduction. With a comparative essay as the such, don't be afraid of stating the opposite opinion first of all. An example introduction may go something like this "Over the last ten years or so, the number of studying methods open to students has increased a great deal. The wide spread use of technology and the internet have given students the choice to study in a variety of different ways. However, I believe that more traditional approaches to studying, such as studying at home, are more effective for a number of reasons" Of course as you can see from my example introduction, I am against more modern methods. However, if you tend to agree, you only need to change the position of the two elements. Your essay also contains a number of grammatical mistakes. You really need to spend the last 5 minutes correcting any mistakes that you have made. I would say that your essay is clearly worth a good three points. Remember practice makes perfect:)

This essay was marked and commented on courtesy of Just English Language Schools