You did not mention about my introduction... :) I focused my introduction this time, actually I liked it, and to be honestl, I did not want to write last paragraphs because I you've already shown my mistakes. Grammar mistakes inevitable for me because I am too careless while I am writing. Also you did not give any score :)

Actually this was my last essay, I don't want to write any more, because it is last 3 days for me, and I want to more focus on speaking and listening parts in that time. You always been very kind and I want to thank you again for your great support. You are filling the meaning of the "TEACHER"

And you have been a good student. İ have added a comment to your introduction:) unfortunately, although you have tried new structures and to some extent successfully. Your last essay is still worth only three points due to the number of grammar mistakes present. Keep it simple and stick to what you are confident with and i am sure you will get the 3.5 you are looking for.